Review Information
Game Reviewed Torpedo Ted, by SuperMakerPlayer, TrafficConeGod
Review Author Bstudios
Created Jun 19 2020, 7:39 AM

General Commentary and Game Overview
An incredibly faithful and fun recreation of a classic game from my childhood, fulfilling my nostalgic desire the very second as that "Robot Rock" hit my ears. Bullet Bill was a series I faithfully played, a even 100% later-down-the-road. As a self-proclaimed "Bullet Bill Expert", I find it my duty to judge this game, on personal bias, in whether or not it manages to be it's own version of a Golden Torpedo Ted

Or, just another Bullet Bill smacking the wall.

(Followed by a Comedic Boom)
Pros A faithful fan sequel to the classic Bullet Bill flash game series, with classic mechanics and familiar graphical styling; this makes for an exciting trip down memory lane for old Newgrounds Flash Portal frequenters.

Smooth mouse control offers pinpoint precision when navigating through the many twisting and turning mazes that make up the 6 levels of this game.

Sweet music and remixed tracks, some from the original Bullet Bill series, make getting through the more difficult sections of this game just a little more bearable in their obscene challenge- before repetition sets in.
Cons A Nauseating Y-Axis shifting mechanic that not only gives headaches, but on rare occasion veers Torpedo Ted directly into the path of obstacles; making for incredibly cheap deaths.

A massive difficulty spike that makes the game nearly unplayable. Frustrating enough that I forced myself to quit after nearly 30 minutes of trying.
5 / 10
A fun and faithful recreation of the classic Bullet Bill games! I'm not entirely sure I can even really deduct points where main gameplay is concerned. The game functions just perfectly, with smooth control and tight powerups to help you through the levels. Where the gameplay falters is in it's insane difficulty. More specifically with the later levels.

Level 3 and onward present a massive difficulty spike, with constantly heightening, grueling challenges that culminate in the nigh-impossible Level 6. My death count on this single level was well above 50, in the 70's range at the very least. And it would've continued getting higher before I finally quit, having wasted a half-hour in a game whose levels are typically only 1 or 2 minutes.
9 / 10
I can't say much against it. It's SMB in SNES styling. With nearly every asset fitting. The only minor complaint I have is a severe lack of enemy variety in design, as well as conflicting styles with the "Ghost-House" theme.
6 / 10
Bumping Techno Music and Sick Dubstep make up a pretty banger soundtrack for this game, with some classic tunes reused from the original flash games that brought a massive slap of nostalgia to my innocent face.

Unfortunately, most of these tunes don't go beyond 50 seconds in length, ending up with incredibly repetitious music that soon becomes droning... And, in time, makes me wish there was a mute button.
Final Words
6 / 10
Torpedo Ted is a fun, faithful homage to the classic Bullet Bill series, enjoyable in it's smooth control, early levels, and interesting mechanics. But kept back from being anything more then a small homage with it's later level's incredible difficulty, rigid screen-turning game-play, and a general lack of concrete polish.

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