Game Reviewed | Mario in Hell, by Old Yuanxian |
Review Author | Cruise Elroy |
Created | Jun 26 2015, 3:45 AM |
Pros | +The graphics might look fine to some... |
Cons | -...but they're pretty lazy -Crashes on newer systems (I had to dig up my very old Windows 7 to play this) -Terrible controls -Horrid camera -There is nothing done to teach you what to do or where to go -Extremely forgettable music -Overused sounds -It's pretty much the 3D equivalent of a Hello clone (It uses the Nightmare engine and nothing interesting has been added) |
Gameplay 2 / 10 |
Okay, so right off the bat when you open the game, you get a help file; you know, those ugly boxes that totally break emersion with a default text box? It's not even changed at all, it's only telling you that it's made in the Nightmare engine. If that isn't a red flag for its quality, I don't know what is. So once you exit the document, you're given a bit to try out the controls. First impressions might tell you "Alright, this is a first person game, so I'll just use WASD." To that, I say ha!...a-and no. You use ESDF, not WASD. Why? It's not even practical, it's just WASD shifted over by one space. Haven't got used to the controls yet? Well, you'd better, because 5 seconds into the game, you'll be bombarded by Bob-Ombs (Nopunintendo) out of nowhere. If you don't get outta the starting area quick, tough luck, game over. So, what does the creator have to say about this? "NOTE: it may be hardly playable in the start, but you can get used to it and enjoy it." Let me just say this: unless it's pretty much an IWBTG-type game, never, ever, EVER come up with an excuse for completely unplayable games. It's probably the worst thing you can do throughout the course of game design. So, you get out of the Bob-Omb Depot, and you start...killing purple mushroom men? Sometimes you can just walk up to the smaller ones and they'll disappear right before your eyes. They'll then drop their caps which Mario will sometimes pick up, I couldn't figure out what made him do so. What the hell? Wait a minute...hell! As you know, MFGG is supposed to be a very kid friendly site. So how come something this...violent got through? The gameplay doesn't improve from there, you pick up a gun and start shooting the mushroom men, again, not very kid friendly. Oh yeah, good luck trying to shoot with the camera. You can't look up or down while in the third person view, and it's bad in every other part. Once again, with the bad controls, you have to RIGHT CLICK in order to switch from third person to first person, and vice-versa. When you change views, sometimes you'll be staring into the eye-searing sky or looking straight below you, often giving your enemies the upper hand. Looks like E. Gadd can't help you now! Did I say anything about almost no edits so far? Yep, E. Gadd can be seen saying "An example room" below, and the physics seem to feel the same in Nintendo Nightmare. There's no effort gone into this to make it stand out from the engine it came from. I didn't get very far before I died, and even when I did the game crashed on me. So, that's where I stopped. Not because of a lack of motivation, but because I didn't want to see any more. It's pretty clear: Mario in...you-know-where is not a game that has effort put into it. |
Graphics 3 / 10 |
All I can say about the graphics is that it makes the N64 look like the PS4. All the models are extremely low-res and blurry, and anything else doesn't look that too appealing either. As mentioned earlier, this is supposed to be a kid friendly site. Once again, the game decides to steer clear of it and add incredibly bright, oversaturated red blood almost anywhere it can. Just like in Spoopy Maryo, the blood is much more hi-res than anything else. |
Sound 4 / 10 |
The music is very forgettable, and nothing more than a MIDI. Even after 5 seconds of closing the game, I already forgot the music. All the sounds are ripped from other Mario games and come standard with Nightmare, or at least I think. Pass. |
Replay 1 / 10 |
If I've already said "Don't play this game," what makes you think I'll say "Replay this game"? It's like the creator said "Replay value can go to hell," but it never...did. (Yeah, that was a bad joke) |
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It really does seem pretty generic, or at least that's what first impressions give. |
Comments |
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Old Yuanxian Jul 2 2015, 1:20 AM |
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Did you play Nintendo Nightmare? If not, play it, then tell me what you think. Thanks for the review though, I'll make a more elaborate comment later when I can.
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Cruise Elroy Jul 2 2015, 2:10 AM |
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I haven't actually played it, but I have seen some gameplay footage. I also still haven't gotten to the boss, but I might consider going back and giving this another chance (temporarily breaking the 1 for replay here, kids). All I can say now is good luck with your future projects. |
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TheTwelfthRocket Dec 21 2015, 9:29 PM |
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Quote (Blutorus) MFGG is supposed to be a very kid friendly site Kid friendly, like in 10 and older? Fine. Very kid friendly? Um...I'm not too sure 'bout that. |
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