Review Information
Game Reviewed N/A, by N/A
Review Author Willsaber
Created Apr 14 2015, 8:21 PM

General Commentary and Game Overview
When reading the author's description, I didn't have very high expectations. But I did expect it to have some amount of polish, because frankly, I'm kind of surprised this was accepted on the mainsite. The sprites are bad, the boss fights are boring, fire balls are unreliable, the collision is wonky, the list goes on and on...

The first thing I want to go over are the bosses. Honestly, they felt like filler. Each boss is its own level where you are thrown into the fight right off the bat, and there are two bosses, which means that 2/6ths of the "levels" are a boss fight. So you've really only got four levels. The really odd thing is that the fourth level is a boss fight (some sort of Evil Mario), then you have a swimming level (the only one in the game), and then another boss fight where you fight a giant Cheep-Cheep. Although I have to admit, the small change in the Cheep Cheep's AI threw me off at first and gave me some excitement, the fact that there is only one level in-between kind of makes it look like the conclusion was rushed. On top of this, why is the final boss a Cheep Cheep? Isn't the game called "Attack of Bowser"? That just adds to the idea of a rushed ending.

The bosses are all fought by shooting your fireballs, which are quite unreliable. It seems that you can't use the fireballs until after you've moved in a level, which doesn't make much sense. They also don't seem to go off regardless of what I do, which has resulted in me taking some damage (not enough to die, though. The only time I actually died was once in the Evil Mario fight). An alternative to fighting is to jump on the enemies (actually, only Goombas. You can't jump on the Cheep Cheeps that appear in ONE level). However, this is kind of hard as they move quite fast and the physics are very awkward. You're better off just avoiding them.

Coins are also in this game... they don't really do anything.
 
Pros - Isn't a virus
 
Cons - Poor graphical choices
- Odd physics
- Bad collision detection
- Repetitive/boring boss fights
- Lacks an obvious level goal (though you'll find it out yourself easily)
- Little enemy variety
- Unreliable combat
- No powerups
 
Impressions
Gameplay
3 / 10
It's a platformer. Really, there's nothing more to say. You control Mario with the arrow keys, and jump with <SHIFT>. Pressing control throws a fireball that is not affected by gravity, and will kill an enemy on contact, however... quite often it doesn't do anything, which can lead to taking substantial damage if you're close to an enemy. The goal of each level is to head right and touch a pipe, which looks exactly like every other pipe in the game.

As far as the physics go, Mario jumps too high, and moves too slow. The collision detection is okay, but there is some lag on the vertical collisions. The one angle of slope works great, though!
 
Graphics
2 / 10
Blegh. The graphics in this game are all Super Mario World, Super Mario: All Stars, or a bad pipe sprite (which happens to be at an isometric angle). Combining two bad styles doesn't make a good one; really, I'm not sure why the developer didn't just use one of the many great styles on this site.

There are a lot of poorly resized graphics here, most notably the bosses and large pipes.
 
Sound
5 / 10
Umm... okay, I guess? The music is okay over-all, and the sound effects are Super Mario World, which aren't bad.
 
Replay
1 / 10
Once was enough. XD
 
Final Words
2 / 10
Super Mario Bros: Attack of Bowser

--Bowser not included--

Comments
User Icon
AsteriskX
Apr 15 2015, 7:15 AM
I kind of lol'd when I read this review. XD
I haven't played the game yet, but I'm sure I'll agree to so much of what you just typed.
 
No Icon
SelfconsciousRelic
Apr 15 2015, 12:24 PM
I am sorry.
 
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Willsaber
Apr 15 2015, 10:20 PM
Quote (RoboticRetard on Apr 15 2015, 6:24 PM)
I am sorry.

I don't mean to seem negative, very few people make a great game off the bat!
 
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